i thought blair would be the last person to fuck me over, but I tend to be wrong alot these days. word got around, people whispering, pretending they dont know shit. but it got around, everything always does. i almost wish her and dallas kept it a secret, so i didnt have to find out and everythin could be cool. The only thing i dont like is the fact that this relationship was clearly a waste of time. And ive only got so much time to waste. I cant say im not upset, because i think i loved her, and i never loved someone before, but im not goin to bitch and moan about somthing thats now in the past. I dont regret it, she showed me how to love. I got up the next morning after i heard, and made sure i kept my mind off of her. i guess the boys knew to, austin caleb and andrew didnt mention a word about it all morning. " hey umm..kyle" andrew said kind of laughin, "u should uhh, fix that hole u created in the wall before dad see's it.." I turned around and saw the dent my fist made from last night wen i heard about what happend, i got so wasted i didnt even remember making a dent. "yea i guess" i said. after i fixed the wall, i went and got caleb and we went out to a party. It was a huge party at the shepards place, and i was hoping blair wouldnt be thier because i had nothin to say to her. luckily she wasnt. you know the drill, we got drunk, smoked, and just hooked up with people. thier was alot of crazy drugs goin around at the party, but i didnt want to land up waking up in someones bush in my boxers in thier front yard or anything. thier were so many hot girls at the party, but i only had my mind on one person. And i knew a blunt and vodka wasnt going to change that. So i took the pills they were offering to me and caleb, and i swallowed them. And the rest i dont remember. i just remember waking up in someones house who i didnt know , laying next to someone i didnt know, and nothing felt right